Slim Thick & D.O.P.E.

I barely know where to start with this one… Weight loss has always been a sticky subject for me, especially when it came to my self-image and the perspective I’ve had of myself (but that’s a topic for another week). Looking back on my journey I realize it was a sticky subject because I was self-conscience and unaware of how DOPE I was.

I won’t say weight gain is something that runs in my family, but I have definitely had my struggles with fluctuating weight and not really having any control over losing or gaining throughout my life, it’s always been something that just happens to me and I go with the flow… it is what it is. In 2018 I had consciously decide that wasn’t good enough anymore because I really did not want to accept that getting older indefinitely comes with gaining weight when you don’t take care of your body and respect your temple.

It was easy when I was young. Growing up, “active” was my middle name: I played basketball, touch football in the neighborhood with the guys, dancing, stepping, double dutch, running track, and really anything that kept me outside; if it could be done I wanted to do it. I don’t know how much I weighed before, but after my father passed I went up to 160, I was a little thickums with chubby cheeks.

Once I got into High School and started walking more and dancing I dropped the weight, got a little taller and managed to remain at 145 until I went into college. Like most freshman going into college I gained the freshman 15 (which was really more like the freshman 25), but it looked good on me (looking back now). Even though I had gone over 160, I never realized I had built more muscle and I wasn’t truly fat… even though I thought I was… just a little thick.

After graduating college when all the physical activity stopped is how and when adulting really hit me. Within 2 years after graduating I had made my way up between 185 and 190, which honestly still wasn’t too bad, but I started to feel the weight gain. I was in a stressful work environment and honestly hated my job. I felt like I had wasted 5 years of my life working for a degree to not even use it, I didn’t see a way out of it, and on top of all of that I was back in Richmond where I did not want to be dreaming of living back in the DMV area where I’d be closer to my boyfriend at the time and my friends. There were so many things not going the way I wanted them to, and my body showed that.

I went through a bit of an emotional roller coaster through the summer of 2015 and had dropped down to 175 in an unhealthy way to say the least, but I was happy that I had finally thinned back down a little. Before I knew it, I was on the path to move back to the DMV, still working a janky job but it was bringing in good money and handling everything I needed it to handle so I took the opportunity and went back to where I thought I was happier.

It’s amazing the things you think will fix all your problems… and then you get it and it doesn’t. God will get your life in perspective real quick with those moments.

After moving to Maryland in 2016, I took a rather quick nose-dive and lost control with my cravings and bad eating habits. It was horrible on my pockets and even worse on my body. 2016 was not a friend to me in many ways, and it showed in how I moved day to day. From struggling financially, to losing friends, and fighting to stay on my feet; I didn’t know what was going on. To top it all off I had blown up to 230lbs+.

In 2018 God really showed me that he had more planned for me than what I had been doing for the 2 years prior. Moving in with my sister was the BEST decision I had made after having two less than desirable roommate situations. We’re sisters, so of course, we get on each other’s nerves but I just want to take a second to thank her for all the amazing things she does and how she’s help mold me into the woman I am today.

I have watched her struggle with her weight as well, but I’ve always admired her for how confident and self encouraging she is every step of the way. I’m sure she was going through things that we didn’t always see on the surface level, but most specifically from May of 2018 until today I have watched her change her life around and really push to lose the weight she’s always wanted to lose.

Talk about a D.O.P.E. queen, she not only started on her journey alone she pulled me and one of our roommates into her journey with her. Now, I won’t lie, we haven’t dedicated ourselves to the degree she has but she is definitely my inspiration to keep pushing even when I don’t want to. The greatest tidbit she’s given me since our journey’s started May of 2018 is the dedication to making a lifestyle change and not just “dieting”. We don’t need to diet, we need to be healthy, and my commitment to living that healthier lifestyle was influenced by her.

There aren’t enough words to express how proud I am of my big sister and her milestone of losing 57 lbs and 34.25 inches!!! She is still pushing forward and I know she isn’t stopping anytime soon I just pray I live up to her amazing example of what it is to be a D.O.P.E. black woman and providing support and encouragement to all the other black women in her circle and whom she comes in contact with on a day to day basis. You are truly amazing and all of the hard work you put in does not go to waste. You are a bright light in my life and I’m grateful to have a sister like you to beat up on me and push me to be a better version of myself everyday.

Since May of 2018 I have successfully dropped down to 205 lbs, I’m maintaining my weight loss, and am so excited about my growth and my dedication to living a healthier lifestyle. Next stop, 190! The most important lesson I have taken from this part of my life is loving myself in all forms no matter how “ugly” I may believe I am at any low point I hit. Being D.O.P.E. is becoming a part of my life and I owe that all to the women in my life, like LaToya, that have seen it in me for so long and have been behind me every step of the way since I’ve decided to walk in my truth.

If you’re on a weight loss journey, I’m here to say keep going! Don’t give up when it gets hard, don’t doubt yourself when you don’t notice results, and remember you didn’t gain the weight over night (somebody wise said that to me once). Lean on your support system, but don’t forget to be your own support system and motivation. Figure out what will convince you to keep moving towards your goal and remember you don’t have to do it all alone!

I know my biggest set back when trying to do most anything is doing it alone. The thing about being alone is there’s nobody to put a mask on for. When you fail it’s on you, but failure isn’t a bad thing, it’s just the thing that tells you it doesn’t work that way. Try a new way and next time you may get a different outcome. It’s okay to be afraid of working out alone, but do it anyway. The only person that has to live with your decisions at the end of the day is you… don’t be miserable if you don’t have to be, and don’t give anybody else the power over making yourself happy.

For those of you wondering how I lost the weight: a lot of walking and staying active with things to do and changing my eating habits mainly. I cut out meat initially along with starches that weren’t vegetables and dairy, I haven’t had pork in a year, and now I try to stay away from rice, bread, pasta, and potatoes (although they’re my favorite). I eat lots of fruits and vegetables, some days I’ll juice for breakfast and lunch and lunch and be sure to eat a nice dinner, but it all depends on how I’m feeling. I don’t really count calories, but I’m conscious about what I’m eating and I focus on portion control. It also helps having my sister on plans to bounce ideas off off to determine if what I am doing is a good idea. All in all the support system is the biggest part of it all, without big sis I’d probably still be trying to figure out how to get started rather than getting started and figuring it out along the way.

I know I’m not the best role model when it comes to exercise, but be better than me… be more like LaToya. Make yourself go to the gym 100 times… and when you reach that goal, start for the next hundred. Find a nutritionist and a personal trainer, find a gym buddy, plan out your meals, choose to stick to an eating schedule… whatever you need to do, do it NOW.

One of my best friends recently said to me “progress not perfection.”

Any step forward, is a step in the right direction. Don’t let ANYBODY take that from you.

Be D.O.P.E. Black People!